HAVE FUN!
The devil decided to close the Pole, Russian and German in a closed room without any doors and windows.
Each of them gave the two metal balls and gave them a week to learn something interesting to do with the balls.
After a week looks in to Russian:
- What did you learn?
- I learned to toss them ...
He looks in to German:
- What did you learn?
- I learned to juggle them ...
She looks in to Pole:
- What did you learn?
But a Pole one ball lost and the other broke down.
Each of them gave the two metal balls and gave them a week to learn something interesting to do with the balls.
After a week looks in to Russian:
- What did you learn?
- I learned to toss them ...
He looks in to German:
- What did you learn?
- I learned to juggle them ...
She looks in to Pole:
- What did you learn?
But a Pole one ball lost and the other broke down.
ANOTHER ONE
An American flies with the
Russian airline. A nice stewardess asks him:
- Would you like a dinner?
- And what is the choice?
- Yes or no.
Russian airline. A nice stewardess asks him:
- Would you like a dinner?
- And what is the choice?
- Yes or no.
AH AH AH AH
An Englishman is calling to the receptionist at a Polish hotel:
- Two tee to room two two.
She answer him:
- Taram, taram, taram...
- Two tee to room two two.
She answer him:
- Taram, taram, taram...
Fai clic qui per effettuare modifiche.
During the job interview the boss asks a man:
- How many languages do you know?
- English, Russian, French
- Say something in French.
- “Gutten Tag”
- But it’s German.
- Oh…. I’m sorry. I know 4 languages.
- How many languages do you know?
- English, Russian, French
- Say something in French.
- “Gutten Tag”
- But it’s German.
- Oh…. I’m sorry. I know 4 languages.
Four Chinese, Chu, Bu, Fu and Su, decided to immigrate to the USA.
In order to get a visa, they had to adapt their names to American standards. Chu became Chuck, Bu became Buck.
Fu and his sister Su decided to stay in China.
In order to get a visa, they had to adapt their names to American standards. Chu became Chuck, Bu became Buck.
Fu and his sister Su decided to stay in China.
'What is the longest word in the English language?'
'"Smiles" Because there is a mile between first and last letters.'
'"Smiles" Because there is a mile between first and last letters.'
A POLE, A CZECH AND AN ITALIAN
A Pole, a Czech and an Italian met the devil. He asked them to bring some plants. The Pole brought a tulip, the Czech a briar but the Italian wasn’t there… The devil asked them to eat the plants. The Pole ate his plant without a problem; The Czech was eating his plant and laughing at the same time.
-Why are you crying? – asked the devil.
-Because I’m eating a briar and it’s painful.
- And why are you laughing?
- Because the Italian is coming with a cactus.
-Why are you crying? – asked the devil.
-Because I’m eating a briar and it’s painful.
- And why are you laughing?
- Because the Italian is coming with a cactus.
Occupation
A German tourist arrives at the airport and the immigration officer asks him: “Occupation ?“
And the German answers: “No, no, I am just visiting.“
Native Americans' Weather Forecast
The Indians (native Americans) ask their shaman what the winter will be like. And the shaman threw his gravels and answeres: “Well, Manito hasnť given his comment yet, but you can prepare and split wood and ask me in two weeks.“ After the two weeks the Indians come again and ask the same, the answer is the same as well. But when they left the shaman takes the phone and calls the meteorological centre and asks about the winter forecast: “What will the winter be like boys?“ “Well, the winter is going to be severe.“ “How do you know?“ “The Indians have already been splitting wood for a fortnight (two weeks).“
Where is the Square?
Jokes about the Jews are very popular in the Czech Republic. They usually include something about business including marriage or just wisdom. Kohn being the most frequently used surname in the jokes.
A man asks another: “Mr.Kohn, please, where is the Jungmann Square?“ (a square in Prague)
“How do you know that my surname is Kohn?“
“Oh, I just guessed.“
“So, you can as well guess where the square is.“
A man asks another: “Mr.Kohn, please, where is the Jungmann Square?“ (a square in Prague)
“How do you know that my surname is Kohn?“
“Oh, I just guessed.“
“So, you can as well guess where the square is.“
_An Old Jew Dying
_An old tradesman taussig is dying and at his death bed his family is standing.
“Sarah, my beloved wife, are you here?“ “Oh yes, I am.“
“And Moyshe, my first son, are you here?“ “Of course my dear dad!“
“And Icik, my younger son, are you here?“ “Yes, I am, my dady!“
“And who is in the shop?!“
“Sarah, my beloved wife, are you here?“ “Oh yes, I am.“
“And Moyshe, my first son, are you here?“ “Of course my dear dad!“
“And Icik, my younger son, are you here?“ “Yes, I am, my dady!“
“And who is in the shop?!“
_Three Presidents and Cannibals
_It was very popular in the Czech Republic that a lot of students from developing countries studied there.
The American, Russian and Czech presidents are captivated by the cannibals. They are tied at poles prepared to be killed and eaten.
The chief comes to the American: "Where are you from?" "America." "Get him to the steak!" Then to the Russian: "Where do you come from?" "Russia." "Get him to the goulash." And finally to the Czech: "Where do you come from?" "The Czech republic." "Great! I studied there!" "What will you have, the steak or the goulash?"
The American, Russian and Czech presidents are captivated by the cannibals. They are tied at poles prepared to be killed and eaten.
The chief comes to the American: "Where are you from?" "America." "Get him to the steak!" Then to the Russian: "Where do you come from?" "Russia." "Get him to the goulash." And finally to the Czech: "Where do you come from?" "The Czech republic." "Great! I studied there!" "What will you have, the steak or the goulash?"
_In a Ghostly Hotel
_An American, a Russian and a Czech bet about who will be able to sleep a night in a ghostly hotel. First the Russian goes sleeping. Alas a sound from a wardrobe says: “I am the red eye“. The Russian escapes.
Second the American goes sleeping there. At midnight the same happens and also the American escapes. Third the Czech goes sleeping there. When the same happens at midnight the Czech cries: “Shut up, or you will be blue!“
Second the American goes sleeping there. At midnight the same happens and also the American escapes. Third the Czech goes sleeping there. When the same happens at midnight the Czech cries: “Shut up, or you will be blue!“
_The Three and a British Jump off the Plane
_An American, a Russian, a British and a Czech are going by plane. But on the plane there are only three parachutes. Suddenly the plane catches fire. The Russian grabs the first parachute saying: “As a member of the most intelligent nation I have the right to save myself.“ The second parachute is grabbed by the American saying: “As a member of the wealthiest nation I have the right to save myself.“ The British takes the third one and gives it to the Czech saying: “I am a gentleman, you go!“
“Ah, it’s OK, keep it, we both can jump out because the one of the most intelligent nation took my rucksack.“
“Ah, it’s OK, keep it, we both can jump out because the one of the most intelligent nation took my rucksack.“
_The Three Recognize Their Motherland
_An American a Russian and a Czech are going by plane and having a discussion if they recognize their motherland by putting a hand out of the plane. The American after a while says: “Well, this is my country, I can feel fine wet wind from the ocean.“
After a time the Russian says: “Ah, this is my country, my hand is getting frozen.“
And finally the Czech says: “At least, this is my country, my watch has been stolen.“
:-) such a joke appears also in the Italian section :-)
After a time the Russian says: “Ah, this is my country, my hand is getting frozen.“
And finally the Czech says: “At least, this is my country, my watch has been stolen.“
:-) such a joke appears also in the Italian section :-)
_The Three after a Plane Crash
_An American, a Russian and a Czech went by plane. The plane crashed and the three survived. Suddenly the native cannibals appear. The chief says: “ If you show me something that I have never seen I will free you.“ And gives each three little glass balls. The Russian juggles with them, but the chief says: “I have seen it, kill him.“ The American plays with the ball like at footbal. But the chief again: “Kill him it is well known.“
And the Czech takes them, drops them on the ground and breaks them. „Freeeee him! I have never seen such a bumpkin.“
And the Czech takes them, drops them on the ground and breaks them. „Freeeee him! I have never seen such a bumpkin.“
_The Three and a Stewardess
_An American, a Russian and a Czech are going by plane and the stewardess says: “Oh, good heavens, you’re the three again!!!“
The three recognize their motherland
There are a man from Naples, a French and an English on an airplane. They are betting: they have to understand on which city the airplane is flying putting a hand out of the window. The English says: "We are on the USA because I'm touching the Statue of Liberty!" The french says" We are on Paris because I'm touching the Eiffel Tower!" The Italian says "We are on Naples, someone stole my watch!"
:-) such a joke appears also in the Czech section :-)
:-) such a joke appears also in the Czech section :-)